These are some of my favorite posts to write because they cause me to document many of the goings-on with our family that would likely be forgotten otherwise. More specifically, identifying The Sweetest Things leads me to intentionally pause and reflect on all the good things in our life.
This particular edition is notable as it is coming after an especially trying period. From September 5 to September 25, I was at the pediatrician's office 7, seven, SEVEN times. Asthma, ear infection, sinus infection, and high fever viruses were a few of diagnoses that lead to a month long cough, snot, and whine fest in our home. Additionally, Lindsay is no longer commuting to Oklahoma but has begun working at a Charlotte based private equity firm, so we're all adjusting to our new normal with him around during the work week. For the kids this really just means Daddy can take them to school or tuck them in at night; for me this means dusting off my cookbooks and eating something besides Nilla Wafers for dinner, doing a few more loads of laundry, and watching a tad less reality television at night.
Let's get down to business, the Sweetest Things of the third quarter of 2013...

1. Variety Vactionland... I remember very few things from any history class I've ever taken, but when our seventh grade North Carolina history teacher taught us that North Carolina is often referred to as 'Variety Vacationland, this phrase stuck with me. I recalled it many, many times when living in states that did not fit this description. (Being landlocked = no bueno.) During the month of July, we took advantage of both the gorgeous beaches and serene mountains of our great state. I LOVE the fact that in roughly three hours on a road trip, we can be in either location. We spent five days in Wrightsville Beach in early July, even celebrating my birthday during our stay.
   
   Perfect ending to my birthday night?
   Under the cover selfies with my Murph.
   
   Suuuuper Baby! 
   (On the rainy days, we were oh-so-thankful for the indoor pool!)
   Our girls soaked up every second from sandcastle building and 'surfing' to hanging out in the kids' club and staying up late. 
   
   Best pic we got of the three.
   With the bright sun, I am surprised any eyes are open.
   
    Laying on the cute to beg for icecream.
   Then, in late July, we met up with one our most favorite families for several days in Cashiers. I had been to the Blowing Rock area of our state several times, but had never before visited the Highlands/Cashiers vicinity. You can be sure we'll be going back, though. It was GORGEOUS.
   
   The screened-in porch with its swing/sofa/bed 
   was a favorite spot for young and old.
   The temperatures were mild, and the mountain town feel was a nice break from the hustle and bustle of real life.
   
   Daddy and Carter took an afternoon trip to a local waterfall.
   Can't wait till our whole crew is big enough for this sort of fun!
   Traveling with six kids ages five and below does not exactly constitute a vacation. Those six kids don't take 'vacations' from their basic requirements, i.e. baths, three meals a day every-single-day, naps, stories, entertainment... Our days were full to say the least.
   
   A morning splash.
   
   After dinner relay races.
   Though the days were hectic, sipping wine, chatting with Kyndal, and listening to our talented hubbies strum their guitars made the whole trip feel like a real vacation. 
   
   Our family.
   
   The whole lot of us.
   (Remembering this makes me all kinds of happy!)
2. Not-So-Hot Summer... spend five minutes around me on a relatively hot day or in a somewhat hot room, and you'll quickly realize that I just don't do hot. I find myself getting irritable when the temperatures are rising even slightly. Fortunately, both for me and those around me, this summer in Charlotte was ridiculously mild; the thermometer barely hit 90 degrees all summer thus making outdoor activities quite pleasant. One of our favorite new (rediscovered in a family friendly way, really) finds this summer was The Green uptown. Several weekend evenings, we'd head over after naps for dinner at Fuel and fountain playing for the girlies. 
   
   After our first visit,
   we learned to pack swimsuits.
   
   Photo-op I couldn't resist.
   
   Perfectly content remaining dry on Mommy's lap.
   
   Upped the fun quotient when cousins tagged along.
   (We seem to have a surplus of girls in our life.)
   For my birthday in July, Lindsay surprised me (really, surprised me. I did not see this gift coming.) with a bicycle with a baby seat already installed. I LOVED this instant motivator to both enjoy the outdoors and get moving. At one time or another, each girlie has spent time riding not-shotgun.
   
   Carter provides the toughest workout, 
   Murphy keeps me entertained, and Wrighty falls asleep almost immediately.
   I'm so thankful to look back on our summer days and feel like I actually got outside and enjoyed them rather than being a summer hibernator basking in the comfort of an air conditioner.
   
   Mild afternoon + a fresh peach = Summertime perfection
3. Back in the Swing of Things... for as much as I was loving our lazy summer days in June and July, by the time August rolled around, I was itching to get back into a routine. By then, all the girls' camps were finished and our trips had been taken. The big girls had spent time with Lindsay's family for camp Tulsa and then several days with my family for Vacation Bible School. The pool didn't have its same sparkling appeal that it did when it was a new and fresh activity just after Memorial Day. We did enjoy a few late summer field trips to non-animal centric spots. We made several trips to Discovery Place Kids, even buying an annual pass (just call me mom of the year.) 
   
   Water table fun at the peak of her 'snuffy' face habit.
   
   Just hanging out in the coral reef.
   
   Murphy's favorite area is the grocery store.
   She may or may not have bullied an eight year old for this buggy.
   
   Keeping her eggs warm.
   Cluck. Cluck.
   We also spent a morning uptown at ImaginOn for a little literary inspiration followed, of course, by a little pizza inspiration courtesy of Brixx. 
   
   Feeling very city-ish waiting for the train to pass.
   I guess to truly be city-ish, we would have ridden the train...
   Regardless of these last ditch efforts at some kid-sized fun, the girlies, like me, were definitely in need of both a set regimen and a companion whose last name was not Lewellen. Fortunately, August did not creep by too slowly, and it was time for Carter to head off to kindergarten. I heard moms talking about feeling sad about sending their babies off to big school, even shedding a bucket of tears over it... not this Momma! I was as excited for Carter to begin this chapter of her little life as she was.
   
   Now, I'm not going to pretend that getting out of bed before 7:00 AM is fun or has come totally naturally. I actually can't recall a time in my life since highschool that I have ever gotten up this early on a regular basis, and I dread the sound of the alarm just as much now as I did back then. I was shocked, though, at how easily our little Night Owl adapted to an earlier bedtime. Six weeks into school, I do still dress sleeping beauty under the covers every morning, carry her limp body downstairs, and set her at the breakfast table where she typically falls forward onto the table. But, by the time we're on the way to school - listening to our 'Jesus music' to start the day on a positive note - she's usually pretty perky. 
   She rides the school bus home and is pretty good about sharing at least a few details of her day. A kinder highlight so far? Being the bathroom monitor. Why? "Because you get to say, 'Shhhhhhhh!' when people are talking and it's ok to tattle." She is her mother's daughter. 
   Just a couple of weeks after Carter got into her kinder-rythm, it was time for Murphy to start her second year of preschool. Miss Murphy was stoked to start school and couldn't wait to see her school friends and meet her new teacher.
   
   Murph wore this black 'yeotard' everyday  that it was clean 
   until the early mornings became to cool for it.
   She marches into her classroom every morning, tosses her backpack into her cubby, and throws me a 'peace-out, Mom' kind of wave. She carries a comb and a yipschtick to school with her every morning, and once requested that I bring her 'the one from New York City' (a fancy new Marc Jacobs' shimmer) rather than her typical Mac shade. The little diva has turned Little Church on the Lane into her own personal runway. 
4. Bestie (and Baby and Boys) Bonding...back in June, my dearest girlfriend from my tween years, my roommate for four years of college, and that person who knows all my dirty little secrets (and loves me still!) was diagnosed with breast cancer. [Bear with me, this is going somewhere very sweet, I promise.] Though I was overcome with deep sadness and wrought with questions of 'Why her, Lord?', I also wanted to step right in an help in any way possible. Like me, she's a momma to three little ones, and I took advantage of every opportunity to love on her littles as their 'summer vacation' became overrun with their mommy's appointments, diagnostic procedures, tests, and treatments. 
   
   Sweet Emerson and Baby Wright.
   A month apart in age; miles apart in hair growth and foot size.
   I absolutely loved the opportunity to get to bond with my 'nephews' and 'niece' in a deeper way that would not have happened otherwise. And I loved that they thought of Aunt Mellie Mel's house as a fun spot where the treats flow freely; not sure they'd ever seen such a vast collection of sprinkles.
   
   Eli loved loading up my iPad with all his favorite apps,
   
   and even tolerated a double-dose of smooches while he played.
   More than once, I've stopped to thank God that in His master plan and infinite wisdom, He placed us in this exact place at just this time. I would have felt sad and utterly helpless to still be living two time zones away from my dear Holly.
   
   Can't imagine two cuter minies in this Mini.
   
   Pin-up girl.
   Our prayers with the girls began to include healing for Aunt Lala and wisdom for her doctors. Of course, Carter was most interested in how silly it was that Aunt Lala's medicine would make her hair fall out and make her 'bald like a baby'. 
   
   Can't. Handle. The. Cute.
   While I certainly wish the circumstances that created the opportunity for all this bonding had been different, I loved watching my bestie's babies bond with mine. I hope they continue to grow up thinking of each other much more like real family than just regular friends. 
   Another sweet, sweet thing that's happened as a result of this ugly, ugly disease is the joy it's been to watch Holly's faith grow and her countenance glow in the midst of it all. She has been an inspiration, not to just me, but to all of those she encounters. Oh, and as for that cancer? She is totally rockin' it out, as my Murphy would say. 
5. NYC...as soon as my physical presence was no longer required for Baby Wright's basic survival (i.e. when I stopped breastfeeding), Lindsay and I got an immediate itch to get away sans girlies. Without even discussing it with each other, we were both - separately - planning a weekend in NYC. I was casually browsing hotels, shops, and restaurants online while he was actually booking flights and buying show tickets. I loved that not only did we both have the 'Let's get away!' idea, but we were completely like-minded as to what that would look like. I can't even articulate how much I needed both the time away from the kiddos and with my husband. Just feeling like me, Melissa, a woman, a wife - rather than Mooooommmmmmyyyyyy! - for four days was so nice. We began our Friday morning with brunch at Balthazar, which, of course, included a 10 AM bellini for me; we were, after all, on vacation. 
   
   Couldn't help but take curious note of the whole cronut craze 
   as we passed this line on our walk to brunch.
   We casually meandered around the city making a stop at my one 'must-do' of our trip: a visit to the Barney's shoe department for boots. As I debated between the tall, black moto style and the shorter brown style, Lindsay said, 'Just get both.' Ahh, the three little words we wives really want to hear. 
   
   I fell in love with him a little bit more 
   as I carried that bag out of the store.
   It had been ten years since we'd been to the City together. On that first trip, we'd taken a picture in front of Serendipity 3 that has remained one of our favorites.
   
   We were babies, and now we have babies.
   Though we didn't go inside to feast on the deliciousness that is Frozen Hot Chocolate, we did stop to recreate that photo.
   
   Hey, lady, why don't you just go ahead and ruin our picture?
   That's cool because
   
   I really prefer this one where my shirt is so awkwardly bunched 
   that I appear six months pregnant. 
   [Grrrrrr...]
   The weather truly could not have been any more perfect during our trip, sunny and mild every day, and our rooftop pool was a great venue to soak it all in.
   
   
   Loved my view(s).
   
   A sweet treat that was mine all mine.
   {This never happens when my three little crumb-snatchers are around.}
   Lindsay and I had been wanting to see 'Book of Mormon' ever since it first hit the Broadway stage. He scored some killer seats to the always sold out show, and we laughed and laughed through most all of it. (There were a few elements that were a bit too blatantly blasphemous for me.)
   
   Husband and wife.
   {Makeup by the AH-MA-ZING David @ Sephora, Meatpacking.}
   We enjoyed all sorts of scrumptious food over the weekend, but my favorite for sure was the lunch we ate at Morandi. Each course was better than the next, and the outdoor dining provided my first (and only, despite much stranger stalking) celebrity sighting of the trip.
   
   Can't say spotting Mario Batali's 
   croc-ed feet really left me starstruck.
   
   This heirloom tomato, plum, and mozzeralla salad though?
   It left me speechless.
   On Saturday night we met up with the whole First Union/Wachovia/Wells Charlotte crew for a fabulous evening of catching up and, of course, more great food. I always enjoy our time together and get a kick out of how different our life in Charlotte is from theirs in NYC. Lindsay and I were the first of the bunch to get married and the only ones who have any children (which would help explain why the idea of beginning dinner at 9 PM was mind-blowing to us.)
   
   The fellas and me.
   (Waaaaaaayyyyyy past my bedtime.)
   On our final morning in the city, we did give in to the cronut craze. Rather than waking up before dawn and standing in the line around the block, we paid a dude from Craig's List to do it for us.
   
   Worth. Every. {Delicious.} Penny
   Our weekend in New York was just the best,  and, I can't wait to get back up there. Although, I have to say that I'm envisioning our next trip including a stop at FAO Schwarz and perhaps a stay in the Eloise room at the Plaza. Getting away without kids is great, but so is exposing them to some American Amazingness. 
   
   
   I wrote the bulk of this post while sitting in my Grandma Margie's hospital room. Though I felt sad at her not being well, I felt so fortunate to be able there with her, providing love and care and companionship. 
   As I said, this time of reflecting on the all the sweet could have not been more opportune. Even with all the not so sweet things that are invading our lives without invitation, each day, regardless of its events, is gift. Simply living, just being is sweet. 

Perfect Princess (Pretend) Pajama Party

October 3 marked the third anniversary of the day that Murphy Girl made her grand appearance into this world. As the date drew closer and closer, rather than feeling nostalgic or in disbelief that Murphy in the Middle was about to hit the three year mark, I felt shocked that she was only turning three. From her darling dictation to her mature posture, being in the presence of Miss Murph feels far more like being around a teenager than a toddler.
Our house was astir with pre-birthday chatter for weeks prior to the big day, but I couldn't seem to decide how to best celebrate. Then, when the right idea struck, it was oh-so-obvious. What was the perfect party for the little girl whose world revolves around Sofia the First, high heels, yipschticks (that's lipstick for those who don't speak Murp), and fancy dresses? A Perfect Princess (Pretend) Pajama Party, of course! Once I had the theme down and made a quick browse of Pinterest, my (and my super talented hubby's) creative wheels started turning on creating the perfect party for our prissy one.

Murphy's actual birthday fell on Thursday.

Her breakfast request? An entire Trader Joe's pretzel loaf for herself.

{With candles, of course.}

She celebrated with her school friends by sharing chocolate chip cookies

and came home wearing a crown 

(which, for Murphy, is pretty much no different that any other day.)

Lindsay had some time off the week leading up to the party which worked out perfectly as he planned to put his hands to work on the most proper princess abode. Here's a little peek at his work in progress:

While he was busy working with saws and hammers, I used the week leading up to the party to make many, many Target runs, prep for the art projects, and get a clear mental picture of how I envisioned things would look on the party day. I planned to keep the food simple and focus most of my planning on decor and activities. When Friday {PARTY DAY!} arrived, I was excited to see how the Princess Party vision I'd had would come to fruition. 

We completely cleared out a room 

and transformed it into a Pretty Princess Parlor.

Hair station.

Complete with hair chalk and glitter hair spray.

Make-up: a zillion shades of eye shadow, fairy dust for cheeks, and yipschticks.

Tootsie and finger painting and bedazzling.

Pink Treat Station.

Tasty Edible Art almond flavored cupcakes with buttercream icing.

The guests sipped princess punch which I served in plastic cups with lids 

I added a little magic wand slipped in with the straws for a princess-y touch.

Princess Party Favor Bags.

Included a tiara and a bracelet. The Princesses added their art projects, too.

Once everything in the house castle was set, King Daddy prepared the guests' entry way...

Murphy's Magnificent Princess Castle.

{Complete with drawbridge, moat, and ivy.}

Happily waiting for the party guests.

Not-so-happily waiting.

{Ahhh, life with Murph.}

Even had time to snap a quick pic of all three!

Princesses Eloise and Leighton arrived right on time.

(And Murphy had already changed back into her Black Swan attire.)

Pajama-clad Princess Eve wanted to 'pose' on the drawbridge,

while little sis, Princess Liza, peeked out from inside.

Pajama Party Princesses.

Group shot.

Once all the princesses had arrived, we headed inside Murphy's palace to commence the festivities. I gave the girlies a rundown of the evening's agenda and handed each of them a Princess Punch Card that would help them keep track of all the royal activities.

Card stock and a cut glitter ribbon to wear around the neck.

Adorned in the bottom corner with a princess-y photo sticker.

The Princess Parlor was a first stop for several of the princesses.

Princess Carter began with an Orbeez tootsie soak.

Leighton chose fun make-up colors and pink hair chalk.

Sizing up the Mirrored Murphy.

Princess Pookie getting a 'punch' between activities.

Busy artists hard at work designing their

Perfect Princess Paper Dolls.

Miss Liza proudly displaying her finished product.

Magic wand decorating.

Busy little birthday girl.

Once the princesses had completed all their princess-y tasks, they worked up quite an appetite. We took a break for pizza and punch. 

Caught our tutu clad Princess Helpers 

getting fancy themselves while the minies filled their tummies.

The birthday girl had been patient, but she was getting pretty antsy to dive into the cupcakes. After a serenade from her royal court, Murphy was more than happy to blow out her three candles. They're hard to see in the pic, but I came across these darling princess themed - a castle, a crown, and a star - candles at Target on the morning of the party.

Make a wish, Princess!

Murphy swiped my phone and took this pic during the cupcake eating.

Love this view from the pink piggie vantage point! 

Once the little ladies had consumed a birthday-party-appropriate amount of sugar, we headed to the living room for our princess movie. At the last minute, Murphy switched her selection from Sofia the First to Tangled. The girls agreed to pose for one more group pic before starting the movie. 

Seven little princesses eager for the movie to begin.

And with the Best princess helpers ever,

My Lilly and her friend Caroline.

Once the princesses were firmly distracted,

Baby Wright seized the opportunity to swoop in and swipe pirate's booty.

Princess Liza was unsure about the tiny princess encroaching on her space,

so she retreated to the safety of a chair.

Eloise and Murphy thoroughly enjoying the movie snacks.

Several of the princesses took a break from Tangled

to revisit the Orbeez.

Eve was giddy at the feeling of them between her toes.

And Murphy and Liza loved squishing the with their hands.

After a fun-filled couple of hours, it was time to bid farewell to all of our princess friends. The usually standoffish Murphy Girl surprised me by hugging each one of them goodbye. 

As the 'middle child', I often worry that Murphy will get caught up in the shuffle of a domineering big sis and a darling baby sis. It was such a joy to plan something tailored just for my Murph and an even greater joy to see her truly relish in all the princess fun. My wish for her is that she will she always feel as princess-y as she did on this day! 

Flying Solo

I’ve talked to many parent-friends, and we all agree: there are just some things that folks without kids just don’t get. Can’t get. Why does it matter that we are home (not en route to home) thirty minutes prior to nap time beginning? Why does going on a date 'night' at 4:00 PM makes total sense (both financially and logistically)? Why is it that sometimes we, parents, truly don’t care that our child is rolling around on the floor beneath our (not another patron’s) table at a restaurant? Why have we have rescinded nearly every, ‘When I have kids, they'll never...’ line that we ever piously declared prior to producing actual spawn of our own?
I think this whole idea is never as evident as it is when it comes to travel. I just stood in a security line at the airport, watching a woman, also flying alone, get increasingly more and more irritated at having to wait to be screened. She had (inadvertently, I suppose) stepped into the line that merged with the ‘family line.’ The folks in front of her had a child (one child) who was strapped into to a carseat that had one of those detachable handle thingys on it. They were fumbling for their boarding passes that were buried deeply within their overstuffed diaper bag, and the screener was making small talk with their little girl. None of this seemed out of the ordinary to me, yet this woman continued to get irritated, even glancing at me (I was in another line) and smugly saying, ‘Looks like a chose the wrong line!’ It was then that I realized: she so. doesn’t. get it. As I was waiting just feet away from her in the parallel security line, I already felt like I was on vacation!

{Perhaps the Zoo Pals sippy cup of vino that I sipped slurped 

in the taxi en route to the airport helped aid the onset  of my overly relaxed state.}

But, truly, I began to feel vacation-y even as I was packing! I mean, I only had to pack for one person, ONE! I did not have to think of diapers or bottles or sippy cups. No need to remember lovies or ponies or tutus or high heels (well, I actually did pack several pairs of high heels, but this time they were not made of plastic or purchased at Target!). I gave no thought to in-flight entertainment; my carry on contains no coloring books, no extra sets of clothes, no baggies of snacks, and no wipes.
When the taxi arrived to pick me up, I only had to think of carrying my own bags outside. I had no concern for folding strollers or installing car seats. I gave no thought to the traffic that surrounded the taxi during the drive. I hopped out of the taxi with a spring in my step, realizing that I had only to get myself through security and to my gate. The only potty breaks would be ones that I needed. As I navigated security, I did not have to keep my eyes constantly moving in different directions to be sure that none of my children had disappeared beneath the skirt of an unsuspecting traveler. When I popped into the ridiculously overpriced airport convenience store, I gave no thought as to whether or not my snack of choice would be sharable or just a mean temptation for my littles.
And now, here I sit at my gate, waiting for my plane which is, apparently, ten minutes or so late. And, what am I doing? Well, I’m blogging of course! Despite the hustle and bustle going on all around me, I haven’t felt this alone in weeks. The sense of serenity that comes with solitude is amazing. And that, my friends, is the most freeing feeling imaginable. I realize that I’m about to board a plane where I will sit for two hours, and I CAN READ A BOOK! Or not. I can watch a movie, a real movie with naughty words and everything! I can do WHATEVER I WANT. I can order a drink, any kind I want!, and not have to weigh the risk ratio of the girls possibly flipping my tray-table and spilling it all over us all.
When the flight touches down in NYC, I will be reunited with my hubby who is meeting me after his flight from his work week in Oklahoma. This will be our first real getaway in over two years (and I’m definitely not counting the single night away in February of 2012 that may or may not produced the cutest little OOPS! you’ve ever seen...). I’m so looking forward to us just being together, alone. We will be able to finish sentences, participate in conversations, and relish in silence. I can’t wait to sleep in, to eat an entire meal in a single setting while it's still hot, to drink (and drink) and maybe drink some more.
What’s funny is that, as much as my non-parent friends couldn’t possibly understand why a musky taxi cab and a busy airport can feel as much like a vacation as a lounge chair by clear blue waters, it’d be equally impossible for them to get that after a few days of this actual getaway, I’ll wish sticky hands were pulling on my skirt as I get ready for dinner. I’ll flip through the stations on the TV in our swanky hotel room, stop on Disney Junior, and quietly hope a new episode of Sofia the First is playing. I’ll notice that I'm choosing my outfits based on what my two and three quarters year old stylist would suggest. I’ll find myself looking at the sites and thinking of how much my biggest girl would love to be here. I’ll miss waking up to the increasingly loud sounds of squealing and jabbering and early morning baby snuggles.

Before I know it, I’ll be missing the chaotic place 

that we fondly call ‘home’ more than I can explain.

But, until then, I'll just sit back, relax, and enjoy the flight...

A Love Letter for My Littlest

My Precious Wrighty Pie,
Can I tell you a little secret? Before you were born, Mommy and Daddy weren't sure if we wanted to have a third child. I even said to myself (and to a few trusted friends!), 'We have two wonderful, yet uniquely different, little girls. I can't picture what having a third child, potentially a third girl, could add?' As I look at you, my beautiful nine month old baby girl, I simply cannot imagine life without you. Really, I can't even comprehend that our family was a family before you joined us. You, my Precious Angel, have completed us.

Our first interaction with each other in the outside world, was your first sleepy nursing session after you were born. I remember you being so tiny that it felt like I was holding a little doll's head in the palm of my hand as you ate. Those first few days were challenging -- for me, I mean. You, My Dear, were a champion eater from the get-go! Upon seeing one of Mommy's battle wounds, Daddy even commented that if men had to breastfeed then all babies would take bottles! But we got through it, you and I, and we settled in at home to begin our journey together.

The beginning of our love story.

Our home in your early weeks was not what I would describe as calm; your two big sisters made sure that having a new baby in the house would in no way hinder their rambunctious activity. So, Mommy began to see our nursing sessions (though still quite painful for me for the first few weeks) as peaceful moments in the midst of our crazy days. Even in the middle of the night when I would hear your little squeak (never a cry) coming from the Moses basket, I was happy to scoop you up for eating and snuggling. Sometimes, I would let you fall asleep on my chest for a couple of hours before the big girls were ready to start their day. The soft brushing of your little peach fuzzed head against my cheek is a feeling I'll never forget.

Sunday afternoon nap for us both.

Week by week, nursing got easier for Mommy, and with the physical ease came an even greater opportunity for our bonding. By Christmas you were staying awake more and more, and when your sweet gaze met mine during feedings, my heart crumbled into a million pieces.

A break from eating to flirt with Mommy.

Because having three kiddos is a lot of work, nursing was pretty much the only time during the day that Mommy actually sat down. And, because you were always such a perfect baby, who was content just watching all the goings-on around you, this was also pretty much the only time I really held you. We would often be joined on the sofa by Carter or Murphy who'd be 'feeding' their babies -- or, more than once, trying to feed you!

Murphy Girl playing Mommy.

As you got older, you'd become more active and distracted while you were eating. If Daddy was around, you were quick to make a head turn in his direction, flash him your million dollar grin, and then get back to the business of eating. You nursed well through sickness and on airplanes, yet you were still willing to take an occasional bottle if Mommy needed to be away during your feeding time.
For the past several months Mommy has been having some problems with recurring infections, and, to keep you healthy, your doctor has strongly encouraged me to make a transition to baby formula and bottles. Mommy has always been of the opinion that nursing ends whenever either party is ready for it to be over. I don't think that either you or I are ready, but the end is here nonetheless.
You and I have been on remarkable journey together, a journey that is coming to an end a little sooner than either of us expected. I will miss the sweet little growling sound you make when you are dozing off at feeding time.

Sleepy sweetheart.

I'll miss the way you twirl my necklace in your long fingers and the way you outline my lips and teeth with those fingers. I will miss our lingering gazes; when I look into your eyes, I feel like I've known you forever.

Full belly. Happy baby.

Even though you don't have the words to articulate how it feels, I know this transition will be hard for you, too,  I promise to make time for special snuggling sessions and to find moments to gaze into those eyes. I know that you don't need to drink Mommy's milk to feel Mommy's love. You are my baby, my last baby, and I feel a sadness that's incomprehensible - even to me - at this ending. During your bedtime feeding last night, I shared many of these feelings with you.

Your sweet eyes stared right at me.

I could almost hear you saying, 'Don't cry, Mommy.'

Thank you for allowing me to be your Mommy. Thank you traveling this journey with me. Forgive me for having to end it sooner than either of us would like. Know that I did my absolute best for you and always will.
I love you more than words can express,
Mommy